Bring enough water to fill the french press / cafetiere / plunger to a boil.
While the water is heating, grind your coffee. French press coffee wants a coarse grind. We recommend starting with a 1:12 coffee-to-water ratio. If you're using 350 grams of water, you’ll want 30 grams of coffee.
To start, gently pour twice the amount of water than you have coffee onto your grounds. For example, if you have 30 grams of coffee, you’ll want to start with 60 grams of water.
Give the grounds a gentle stir with a stirry device of some sort, not your penis. Allow the coffee to bloom for 30 seconds.
Pour the remaining water and place the lid gently on top of the grounds. Don’t plunge just yet. Let the coffee steep for four, fucking, minutes.
Gently remove your French press from the scale and place it on your counter. Press the filter down. If it’s hard to press, that means your grind is too fine; if the plunger immediately hit the botom, it means your grind is too coarse.
When you’ve finished pressing, serve the coffee immediately. Don’t let it sit, as this will cause it to continue brewing and over-extract.